Overcoming anxiety after being in a toxic relationship can be very difficult. Your body and mind have been on an emotional roller coaster and you may feel completely powerless.
A big part of over overall mental health and well being is impacted by our relationships with others. When these become toxic, it can break you apart in ways you might never have thought possible. Even the strongest of us can be completely shattered by a toxic relationship.
Even if your relationship starts off heavenly, it can become anything but. Like many things in life, nothing stays the same forever. We grow and evolve, and therefore our relationships grow with us. Sometimes they can flourish, and other times they can become bitter. However, we often don’t know until it’s too late.
A toxic relationship can cause significant harm to your own sense of self-worth, your mental health and how you see the world around you. They can even seep into your other interpersonal relationships.
How do I know if I’m in a toxic relationship?
Some relationships can be toxic from day one, while others sour over time. It can be the fault of one or both parties, and sometimes you simply weren’t meant to be to begin with. Becoming aware of a toxic relationship can be distressing. You might want to leave but not know how, or you might want to work at it. And while it can be more trouble than it’s worth to stay, it’s by no means hopeless. Until it is.
By knowing the signs of a toxic relationship, even if you stay, you’re better able to identify the behaviours. This gives you back some control and power, allowing you to draw the line when things get too much.
While all people and relationships may have aspects of the following at some time, that doesn’t make them toxic. However, if these signs pop up consistently, loudly and are damaging your own self-esteem, then it might be time to call it quits.
- You’re always waiting for the bomb to drop.
- You avoid saying what you need to out of fear or because it falls on deaf ears.
- There’s no effort.
- You’re the one constantly compromising.
- All the hard work comes from you.
- NO very much feels like a dirty word.
- You’re both constantly keeping score.
- Physical, verbal or emotional abuse.
Have you any other signs you’d like to share that haven’t already been mentioned?
5 Ways to overcome anxiety after a toxic relationship.
This is a guest section written by Sam from Travels with my boys.
Overcoming anxiety after being in a toxic relationship can be very difficult. Your body and mind have been on an emotional roller coaster, and it’s not uncommon to feel powerless. While things may seem confusing and uncertain now, overtime you’ll slowly begin to heal. Here are five helpful tips to help you on your way.
It might sound silly but by placing positive affirmations all around your house you can help combat negative self-talk. You can place them over mirrors and doors. And even on the dashboard of your car! They work best when said aloud and repeated daily. This way your brain is better able to retain and retrain!
2. Never be afraid to talk about it.
This can be really challenging for someone with anxiety, but it can help to talk to someone. Are you wondering why talking to people helps? Talking to someone about what’s on your mind can help you figure it out and calm the noise in your head. While it can be difficult, it’s better to push past the doubt and talk things over.
It may seem strange after everything you’ve been through in your toxic relationship. However, being thankful for even the small things, helps encourage you to see the bigger picture. You could start a gratitude journal, and before going to bed write down three things you are thankful for that happened that day. This will calm your brain and overtime help reduce overthinking.
When you’re within a toxic relationship, it’s common to stop doing the things that make you happy. It’s not uncommon to feel like you’ve lost yourself. That’s why it’s so important to participate in self-care. Start off small if it feels strange to you.
- Read a book
- Go for a drive
- Paint or colouring
- Go for a walk in nature
Giving yourself some self-love is a big step towards overcoming your anxiety. When you loose yourself in a toxic relationship, you need to retrain yourself to realise you are strong, you are beautiful and you can do this!
Learn to listen to your body and take a break when your body needs it. If you keep pushing yourself to empty it can make your anxiety even worse. Its time to look after you.
5.Try some meditation or practice yoga.
When you have anxiety you feel like your constantly on the go and can get drained quite quickly. This is why it’s easy to try meditation or yoga. There are many Youtube videos or podcasts to help you learn. Especially now that COVID-19 is preventing us from going to classes.
If meditation or yoga doesn’t seem like your “thing”, then there are other techniques you can try when your brain is on overdrive. One simple technique that can help is learn how to breathe. Now that may sound silly but when your brain is in the frantic mode we can often forget to breathe. Stop, take a breath, and think of five things to ground you.
There is no quick fix for beating anxiety, and it can be hard work but some of the steps included above will put you on the road to a better life. You CAN beat your anxiety and you WILL beat your anxiety.
** If you like what I do please consider donating to my KO-FI fund.